Napoleon Hill and Persistence

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Napoleon Hill and Persistence

I am in the midst of a delightful task. I’m editing a book by a man who is sharing his lifelong adventure in achieving his goals. I love the stories and the history behind them. When he has it published I’ll let you know about it. The topic of his book is covered in the rest of this short post

If you’re not familiar with Napoleon Hill then I’m going to assume you’re just beginning to learn how to expand and get what it is you want in life. If you aren’t new, but haven’t heard of him, then you’re in for a treat. His most famous book is Think and Grow Rich. It’s a distillation of his much larger book The Law of Success in 16 Lessons.

We live in a society in which the technology of today has imprinted upon us that everything we want must come immediately. Food comes out of fast food restaurants or microwaves at home, you can text someone for an immediate answer, you can find almost any answer by using your search engine.

This “instant gratification” has spilled over into our educational system and work environment. Kids think they should be able to get the grades they want without doing the work needed. Young people coming out of college believe they should be hired for a job that requires 10 years experience. Almost everyone seems to forgotten that it takes time to learn new skills and achieve the goals you want.

Today I want to focus on one of Napoleon Hill’s quotes. “Patience, persistence and perspiration make an unbeatable combination for success.”

When you learn any new skill it takes time. You are engaging your brain and your body. They have to learn to work together. Each time you practice there are electrical impulses which form tracings, or roadway, in your brain. It’s important to be patient while waiting for everything to come together so that you can learn your skill. Once you learn, and keep practicing, you will get better and better. If you want to be the best at what you do, count on spending about 10 years to become a master in your chosen area.

You don’t have to be number one in order to accomplish anything. If you’re learning how to set up a webpage all you need are step-by-step directions, the patience to follow them and the persistence to keep doing what you’re doing.  If you keep following this process, what would have taken you 100 hours to accomplish you could get down to 10 depending upon the project.

Not everyone wants to be the top in their field. They simply want to be good. There is certainly nothing wrong with being “just” good at what you do. If you have a passion for something, be it a hobby or an area of work, you will naturally be drawn into learning more and practicing more. Because you’ll be having such a great time following your passion, one day you’ll become aware of how good you are. In fact, you’ll be better than most.

there are number of things I enjoy doing but I’m not particularly good at, at least when compared to other people. Video games is one of these areas. I was playing a Harry Potter Lego video game with my seven-year-old great-nephew. Let’s just say that he beat the socks off of me, as they would say. my favorite “pass the time” game I play on the computer is Bejeweled 3. I’m sure most of my little nieces and nephews could beat me at that also, that my purpose and playing it is not to be excellent at it. It’s to relax.

I’m a writer in a healing facilitator by profession. These are very important to me. I want to master these areas. That means I practice and practice and practice, with some timeout for more education, and then practice some more. I don’t want to be just good in these areas. I want to be excellent.

What is the most important thing to you in your life? Your answer tells you what it is you need to focus on. This is where you keep working, keep learning, keep practicing and never give up. Don’t worry about how much time it takes. Time will pass. You can either accomplish something with it or look back and wonder why you didn’t do anything of value to you.

 

 

Help You Find Your Place in Life

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imageWays to Use Affirmations to Help You Find Your Place in Life

I’m going to share with you some affirmations you can use to find your passion and what you do in life. First, let me share what happened with an acquaintance. I was doing a Body Talk session with her and boredom  and came up. Unfortunately, boredom is a common experience of people in their job. Many people feel stuck because they aren’t happy with what they’re doing or they feel that something is lacking, but they don’t know how to find that sweet spot of life.

How You Block Your Inner Knowing

Within you, what I call your inner knowing, is the answer to what it is you would like to do with your life. It isn’t often in the form of a bill board. The answer is rarely delivered in a letter. Usually, you come to know where you belong in the work world by paying attending to the excitement or tingling sensation which comes when you think about a particular opportunity.

Many people try too hard to figure out what they want to do. Often, they completely forget to notice what they already enjoy. The key to your passion is what you love to do. There can be a wide variety of activities or occupations in what you most enjoy. For instance, if you enjoy working with children, and have the necessary education, you could be a teacher, adoption worker, foster care worker, own a day care, work with the Special Olympics, be a foster or adoptive parent, run or work in a camp, or multitudes of other possibilities.

Others cut off the knowledge that comes from deep within because they’re afraid of making a mistake with their choice. If you have an idea of what you would like to do, and it involves a great deal of education, volunteer or apprentice in that particular area if at all possible. I have a cousin who wanted to be a nurse. That is an intense educational process. She decided to see if she would like that vocation by becoming educated at the lowest level of caretaking in the nursing field. After discovering she did, indeed, enjoy the nursing field, she became a nurse and worked in it for a number of years.

If you only work in your chosen field for a few years, you’ve gained invaluable experience.  My personal belief is that every job or profession you undertake, as well as every experience in life, brings you to whatever is next. There are no mistakes in this area. There is only a gathering of experience and learning. Go ahead and take a risk and try doing something you have in mind.

Affirmations to Clear the Subconscious Mind

Now let’s give your subconscious mind some instructions. These instructions are very important. They tell your subconscious mind what it is you actually want to happen in your life. Whatever is there on the deepest levels of yourself, that is what your subconscious mind works to make happen. We want to give this very powerful and often forgotten aspect of yourself some clear instructions about what you want. Remember, we want them to be positive.

Before I give you these affirmations, I want to impress upon you the importance of engaging the feeling level of yourself in this process. Don’t just repeat the statements to yourself like the multiplication tables. Feel them. See yourself engaged and happy in whatever it is you’re doing. Use all of your senses as you repeat these affirmations to yourself.

  1. It is easy for me to know what I want to do with my life.
  2. I pay attention to the quiet whispers of my inner knowing.
  3. Every day my passion in life becomes clearer and clearer.
  4. I am excited, delighted and fulfilled by what I have chosen to do.
  5. I am filled with a sense of purpose.

Get started with these affirmations, now. Search the Internet for others which ring true to you. Take a risk and have fun.

Affirmations and “Laziness”

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Affirmations and Laziness

Has anyone told you you are lazy? Perhaps you’ve told yourself that many times. You can use positive affirmations to move yourself past your reluctance or inability to take action. But first, let’s look at what might be behind the supposedly laziness.
How Fear Impedes Action
Most people others call lazy actually have deep-seated fears. Some of the most common ones are fear of:
  • responsibility
  • failure
  • success (which often is related to responsibility)
  • being different
  • being separated from friends and family

Any fear you have is based upon the belief that what you are contemplating doing is unsafe. Your acquired these beliefs when you when you were very young. Almost all of them originated before you were the age of five.

When you were little you may have been punished or made fun of when you initiated something. Perhaps you started a game and someone was angry because you woke up Mom or Dad.  You might have a desire to be an artist but the rest of your family is into sports or business. Your passion may take you away from loved ones and the security of home and friends.

It’s important to take time to recognize your fears. You might even have a fear of knowing what your fear is! That’s a never ending circle, isn’t it.

How Not Knowing Impedes Action

Many people appear to have a lack of ambition simply because they don’t know what they would like to do with their life. They haven’t found their passion yet. They haven’t discovered what it is that will motivate them to do something more than they are doing now.

If someone appears to be a dedicated couch potato, you can be sure that if there is a fire they will get moving. Having passion calls for having an activity which ignites the fire within to find a goal and follow through with it.

Usually fear of making the wrong choice interferes with discovering something the person is passionate about. Those who have always been excited about something in life or who have always known what they wanted to do when they were adults have a difficult time understanding anyone who can’t find themselves.

I was blessed with knowing what I wanted to do. I studied psychology, have three degrees in it, and still enjoy learning about the field. I’m the only one in my family of origin who is doing what they initially studied. Many of my nieces, nephews and their children also took a few years to figure out what they wanted to do.

Not knowing what you want to do can be disconcerting, but it is nothing to be ashamed of. If someone tries to shovel shame on you, don’t take it! You can’t find your passion if you have shame clinging to you.

How Affirmations Help

People who appear lazy often repeat the same statements, “I don’t want to,” “I can’t,” “I’m not interested,” or other self-limiting beliefs. Each time a limiting belief is repeated, it reinforces the limitation. When you use positive affirmations, positive statements, you are counteracting the limiting belief. You are also beginning to construct a new pathway in your brain which will open you to different possibilities.

Suggestions to Move You Forward

If you want to change, you have to take action. This begins by changing the messages you give yourself.

Changed the “I can’t” to “I can.” Follow that up with doing something different that you know you can do. It can be as simple as walking around the block.

You might want to replace “I don’t want to” with “I want to find out what I enjoy.” Follow that with the action of listing three things you enjoy doing. Then repeat to yourself, “I am discovering what I truly want to do with my life.”

If the difficulty is that you are afraid, take a deep breath, hold it for a count of four, and then exhale as much as you can. Follow that with the positive affirmation, “I have the necessary courage to overcome my fears.”

Whatever limiting affirmation you are repeating, turn it around. Develop affirmations which open you to limitless possibilities.

Jumped Starting the Subconscious

Every time you use a positive statement rather than a limiting one, you are opening your subconscious mind to a different possibility in life. When you use limiting words, your subconscious mind wants to support those words. When you use words opening you to possibility, your subconscious mind wants to support you in that area.

Not only the words need to be open to possibility, but also your attitude. You could ask, “Why” with an attitude of anger which closes off getting the answer. When you attitude is one of wanting to know the answer, your subconscious mind says, “Oh, you really want to know? Let’s look for the answer.”

Developing affirmations take some skill. Once you learn how to do it, you’re on your way. Just remember to put your whole self into them as I talked about in the last post.

Positive Affirmations for Career Success

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Positive Affirmations for Career Success

The major reason clients come into my office is to assist them in becoming successful in life. They asked me, “What can I do? Are there some affirmations I can use which can help me become successful in my field?” Yes, of course there are. There is something even more important than affirmations for success. This is believing in yourself.
The Combination of Words and Action
Just minutes ago I was working with the man who is extremely talented. He will soon have his doctorate, he’s an excellent writer, he has tremendous insight into his field. There is one thing he does not have. That is the self-confidence to do what he needs to do to reach his ultimate goal.
I’m going to tell you the same thing I told him. It doesn’t matter if you have self-confidence. It only matters that you have a plan and you follow it. When you follow one at a time the steps you have outlined, you will gain self-confidence on the way.
Stating affirmations does you absolutely no good if you do not couple them with action. when you combine positive statements with taking the steps necessary to move forward your entire being comes into alignment moving you to what you want to accomplish.
You can have all the gasoline you want in a car, but if you do not turn the key it will not move forward. The same is true for positive affirmations. Think of these statements that you make as the gasoline to your car. Taking action is turning the key so that it all comes together. When you combine the repetition of what you want to become beliefs to guide your life with the action necessary to accomplish your goal, you will gain self-confidence. And with that you will become successful in your career and other areas of life.
Putting Together Postive Statements with Powerful Imaging
I’m going to give you two sets of affirmations. The first has to do with believing in yourself. The second has to do with success in your career. I’m assuming here that you know what it is you want to be going.
Remember you have to combine words with action. In this case, I want you to incorporate the power of your mind. Do this by imagining yourself being or doing what the affirmations states. After doing this exercise, take the first step necessary to manifest your goal. This could be picking up the phone, taking a course, or some other necessary step. Just be sure it move  you forward and is not just spinning your wheels, so to speak.
To Increase Self-Confidence
  1. I have unlimited potential.
  2. My very being radiates competence and confidence.
  3. I am excited about life and the possibilities available.

To Attract Success in Your Career

  1. I have the ability to become competent and capable in any area of expertise I apply myself.
  2. I attract to me the perfect career, at the perfect salary with the perfect benefits for me.
  3. Every decision I make leads me directly to the achievement of my career goals.
Summary
Each time you repeat any of these statements imagine yourself being what you have just said. Believe in yourself and follow your plan.

Tips for Writing Your Own Affirmations

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Tips for Writing Your Own Affirmations

Affirmations are simple positive statements you make which reinforce something in your life. These statements can be about what you would like to have, such as riches and fame, or the type of person you would like to be, such as loving or assertive. You can always go to your favorite search engine and find affirmations particular to your situation. The best, however, are those you develop for yourself. Here is a simple process in which you can do this.

Identify What You Want

Many people believe this is very easy. You may think you want riches, but you would really like is security. When you say you want success, you may actually desire a parental approval.

To discover what you truly want in life keep repeating the same question. That question is, “And what will that get me?”

For instance, you say you want a particular type of house in a specific neighborhood. Ask, “And what will that get me?”. An answer might be, “It’ll prove I’m successful.” Now ask, “And what will that get me?” This time you might say, “People will notice me.” Repeat the process. You might get, “People will look up to me.” Keep doing this until you get a sort of ah-ha internal experience. Then you know this is truly what you want.

Develop Your Positive Statement

Now that you know your true desire put it in a positive statement using present tense. An example, “My family notices my success and congratulates me.” If you follow the process above, this affirmation may be exactly what it is that you truly want. Yes, you may still have that house in mind, but that comes later in the process.

If you get your house, but don’t get what you truly want, you will still feel dissatisfied and empty. The key is to  uncover your deepest yearnings. When those are fulfilled you will experience joy and completion.

Identify How You Will  Know You Have What You Most Want

This process actually works with your subconscious mind. It is your subconscious mind which silently guides and directs you by means of what it believes you want to happen in your life. Your subconscious mind is concrete, not abstract. It doesn’t deal in feelings (unless you tell it what those feelings mean), but black-and-white statements. You have to tell it what you mean by what you say. This is where that house you have your eye on comes in.

How will you know when you have achieved,  “My family notices my success and congratulates me.” List three things you will see in your life when the statement, “My family notices my success and congratulates me” is fulfilled. This is where you put things such as, “I have a house with four bedrooms and three bathrooms built to my specifications on an acre of land next to the water,” “My children attend an elite private school and are at the top of their class,” or “My income after taxes is $250,000.”

Once you have these three things you will see that proves your success, get in touch with how it will feel, what people will say about you, and everything else involved in your achievement. Since you want your family to notice you you will want to add comments your family would say to you such as, “I’m proud of you,” “You have really done well,” or “Congratulations.”

Anchoring It In

The last step is to use your affirmation while keeping in mind those marks of achievement with all the feelings and comments from others involved. Do that now. Now touch your thumb to one of your fingers as an anchor to what it is you desire. Throughout the day repeat that statement of achievement keeping in mind the images, words and feelings which accompany it.

Just repeating this statement over and over will do very little. You need to bring with you the visual, auditory and kinesthetic experiences which accompany your accomplishment.

The Life and Death Choice that Resulted in Death

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The Life and Death Choice that Resulted in Death

We all make stupid decisions or, perhaps, I should say choices. “Decisions” sound as if you listed pros and cons and then made a selection of the best thing to do. “Choices” is something you can make on the spur of the moment.

When I was driving home from Atlanta on Sunday, there was a car in front of me swerving back and forth. A couple of times she (I did get close enough to see her) missed the 18 wheeler to the right of her by inches. A few minutes later I thought she was going to hit the concrete barrier to the other side of the freeway. That would have put me and a slew of other cars and huge trucks crashing into each other.

To say I was getting worried was an understatement. I was looking for a way out of the unusual amount of traffic that Sunday morning. (People were returning home after the Alabama vs LSU football game.) Finally, she seemed to be staying in her lane. I took a huge chance and punched the gas peddle to get beyond her. That’s when I discovered the driver was a she and SHE was texting. Hopefully, she made it home and no one was hurt or killed.

A few minutes later I passed a black SUV with a bumper sticker at the top of the back window. “My brother was killed by a distracted driver.” That young woman made a choice to text when she knew it was dangerous. She figured it wouldn’t happen to her. After all, she was being careful. As I see written… NOT. I can’t believe her passenger wasn’t wetting his or her pants. Texting may have been happening from that seat, also. Texting in the passenger seat is allowed.

When I got home I heard the news that one of my nephew’s dear friends wasn’t so lucky. He was engaged in behavior that “everyone” knew was dangerous. There certainly is enough information out there for “everyone” to know that what he was doing was tempting death. He tempted one time too many and death grabbed him. His beautiful life gone. His family and friends are grieving. The world doesn’t get to discover what a gentle and wonderful person he was. He was also very bright… and very stupid. He died for his stupid choice because he felt invincible. “It won’t happen to me” can be pathetic last words.

Think about the stupid things you did yesterday that could have resulted in your death. Perhaps you became impatient and crossed the street earlier than was safe. Maybe you allowed yourself to be distracted while driving. You and I do dumb things every day that “but for the grace of God go I” into the grave, or the hospital.

There is a balance between taking risks and being stupid. Life is full of risks. You can’t progress far if you don’t take some. There are those risks that are just stupid… texting while driving, drinking while driving, taking drugs, walking on the edge of the slick cliff. There are actions that appear risky to those who don’t have skill, that are not as risky to those who do have skill. Know the difference.

My deepest sympathy to Alex’s family and friends. I’m sure that the young man I once met would have made another choice if he knew his death would be the result. He didn’t think it could happen to him.

What You Say and Do When Anonymous

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The Mark of Who You Are: What You Say and Do When Anonymous

Have you had the occasion to read the comments of readers on various news web sites? I’m a regular reader and sometimes contributor to the Houston Chronicle site (www.chron.com). I must admit, however, I have been seriously considering staying out of the comments sections. I’m in absolute amazement what is often put there as comments.

Here are a few things I’ve gathered from comments by people.

1. There is little belief in “innocent until proven guilty.” A news report talks about what someone is purported to say and do and those commenting are ready to convict.

2. Many commenting believe people should immediately be killed for something they are accused of. It doesn’t matter if someone that person is alleged to have murdered someone or stolen from someone.

3. There is an aversion to the facts. One person will post a link to a particular fact and others will say “thumbs down.” I don’t know if the “thumbs down” folks are saying they doubt the fact or if they disagree with it. Facts are facts. How people use them is another matter entirely.

4. Most people use generalizations: “all liberals,” “all conservatives,” etc.

5. There are many “shoot from the hip” responses. These appear to have little thought given to what is written.

6. Many people comment without reading the entire story. Now, I must admit, this may not be true. Sometimes more facts are added later in the day but the comments to the original story remain. It appears someone is commenting on one story when, in fact, they were commenting on an earlier story with less detail.

7. Many people show little desire or ability to examine a situation from various perspectives. By this I mean, many have difficulty in “walking in another’s shoes.” This usually happens when there is a tragic accident such as a mother backing over her child and killing her little one. Certain individuals immediately blame the mother without realizing, “There but the grace of God go I.” Mom is already blaming herself and will do so the rest of her life.

8. There are a lot of really mean people out there. These folks don’t care who they hurt by their words.

9. There is a stark division of beliefs with a great deal of black and white thinking. Many believe you are either conservative or liberal. These folks would probably be befuddled by someone like myself who has some beliefs which are considered liberal and others considered conservative.

10. There are a number of people who appear to believe that if you don’t agree with them then you don’t deserve anything but bad things.

11. A number of people believe that a cogent argument consists of name calling.

I could write more, but these are the major things I notice. Sometimes I attempt to respond to the comments with something rationale. There are other times, much to my chagrin, when I am tempted to respond in a hostile way that I would not respond if we were talking face to face.

Anonymity often brings out the baser qualities in humans.

I read an interview with a man who talked about his comments to news stories. He said he has been banned by the Houston Chronicle for his opinions. He would not allow his name to be published because he says things on-line he’d never say publicly. He said he might be fired for his comments.

I wonder why we humans do this. Do we hold so much anger within us that, in situations where no one knows who we are, we vomit it out upon everyone? Is there something about the power of words to hurt that we enjoy that power without realizing what effect it has on others?

I don’t have the answers. It would be a fascinating research study into human nature. Perhaps it’s all about power. I just don’t know.

I have learned that I, also, have the tendency to write things I would ordinarily not say. I haven’t been happy with that revelation about myself. I work to examine my thoughts and how I express them since I’ve become aware of that side of me.

I want to be an instrument for good rather than ill. Sometimes my human frailties interfere with that desire. I have to catch myself. When I do, I realize my reactions are due to my own wounds. I discover an area in need of healing and then use the tools I have to heal that area.

From the comments on various on-line sites, I would hazard to guess we are all in need of deep healing.