self-confidence

Help You Find Your Place in Life

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imageWays to Use Affirmations to Help You Find Your Place in Life

I’m going to share with you some affirmations you can use to find your passion and what you do in life. First, let me share what happened with an acquaintance. I was doing a Body Talk session with her and boredom  and came up. Unfortunately, boredom is a common experience of people in their job. Many people feel stuck because they aren’t happy with what they’re doing or they feel that something is lacking, but they don’t know how to find that sweet spot of life.

How You Block Your Inner Knowing

Within you, what I call your inner knowing, is the answer to what it is you would like to do with your life. It isn’t often in the form of a bill board. The answer is rarely delivered in a letter. Usually, you come to know where you belong in the work world by paying attending to the excitement or tingling sensation which comes when you think about a particular opportunity.

Many people try too hard to figure out what they want to do. Often, they completely forget to notice what they already enjoy. The key to your passion is what you love to do. There can be a wide variety of activities or occupations in what you most enjoy. For instance, if you enjoy working with children, and have the necessary education, you could be a teacher, adoption worker, foster care worker, own a day care, work with the Special Olympics, be a foster or adoptive parent, run or work in a camp, or multitudes of other possibilities.

Others cut off the knowledge that comes from deep within because they’re afraid of making a mistake with their choice. If you have an idea of what you would like to do, and it involves a great deal of education, volunteer or apprentice in that particular area if at all possible. I have a cousin who wanted to be a nurse. That is an intense educational process. She decided to see if she would like that vocation by becoming educated at the lowest level of caretaking in the nursing field. After discovering she did, indeed, enjoy the nursing field, she became a nurse and worked in it for a number of years.

If you only work in your chosen field for a few years, you’ve gained invaluable experience.  My personal belief is that every job or profession you undertake, as well as every experience in life, brings you to whatever is next. There are no mistakes in this area. There is only a gathering of experience and learning. Go ahead and take a risk and try doing something you have in mind.

Affirmations to Clear the Subconscious Mind

Now let’s give your subconscious mind some instructions. These instructions are very important. They tell your subconscious mind what it is you actually want to happen in your life. Whatever is there on the deepest levels of yourself, that is what your subconscious mind works to make happen. We want to give this very powerful and often forgotten aspect of yourself some clear instructions about what you want. Remember, we want them to be positive.

Before I give you these affirmations, I want to impress upon you the importance of engaging the feeling level of yourself in this process. Don’t just repeat the statements to yourself like the multiplication tables. Feel them. See yourself engaged and happy in whatever it is you’re doing. Use all of your senses as you repeat these affirmations to yourself.

  1. It is easy for me to know what I want to do with my life.
  2. I pay attention to the quiet whispers of my inner knowing.
  3. Every day my passion in life becomes clearer and clearer.
  4. I am excited, delighted and fulfilled by what I have chosen to do.
  5. I am filled with a sense of purpose.

Get started with these affirmations, now. Search the Internet for others which ring true to you. Take a risk and have fun.

Affirmations and “Laziness”

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Affirmations and Laziness

Has anyone told you you are lazy? Perhaps you’ve told yourself that many times. You can use positive affirmations to move yourself past your reluctance or inability to take action. But first, let’s look at what might be behind the supposedly laziness.
How Fear Impedes Action
Most people others call lazy actually have deep-seated fears. Some of the most common ones are fear of:
  • responsibility
  • failure
  • success (which often is related to responsibility)
  • being different
  • being separated from friends and family

Any fear you have is based upon the belief that what you are contemplating doing is unsafe. Your acquired these beliefs when you when you were very young. Almost all of them originated before you were the age of five.

When you were little you may have been punished or made fun of when you initiated something. Perhaps you started a game and someone was angry because you woke up Mom or Dad.  You might have a desire to be an artist but the rest of your family is into sports or business. Your passion may take you away from loved ones and the security of home and friends.

It’s important to take time to recognize your fears. You might even have a fear of knowing what your fear is! That’s a never ending circle, isn’t it.

How Not Knowing Impedes Action

Many people appear to have a lack of ambition simply because they don’t know what they would like to do with their life. They haven’t found their passion yet. They haven’t discovered what it is that will motivate them to do something more than they are doing now.

If someone appears to be a dedicated couch potato, you can be sure that if there is a fire they will get moving. Having passion calls for having an activity which ignites the fire within to find a goal and follow through with it.

Usually fear of making the wrong choice interferes with discovering something the person is passionate about. Those who have always been excited about something in life or who have always known what they wanted to do when they were adults have a difficult time understanding anyone who can’t find themselves.

I was blessed with knowing what I wanted to do. I studied psychology, have three degrees in it, and still enjoy learning about the field. I’m the only one in my family of origin who is doing what they initially studied. Many of my nieces, nephews and their children also took a few years to figure out what they wanted to do.

Not knowing what you want to do can be disconcerting, but it is nothing to be ashamed of. If someone tries to shovel shame on you, don’t take it! You can’t find your passion if you have shame clinging to you.

How Affirmations Help

People who appear lazy often repeat the same statements, “I don’t want to,” “I can’t,” “I’m not interested,” or other self-limiting beliefs. Each time a limiting belief is repeated, it reinforces the limitation. When you use positive affirmations, positive statements, you are counteracting the limiting belief. You are also beginning to construct a new pathway in your brain which will open you to different possibilities.

Suggestions to Move You Forward

If you want to change, you have to take action. This begins by changing the messages you give yourself.

Changed the “I can’t” to “I can.” Follow that up with doing something different that you know you can do. It can be as simple as walking around the block.

You might want to replace “I don’t want to” with “I want to find out what I enjoy.” Follow that with the action of listing three things you enjoy doing. Then repeat to yourself, “I am discovering what I truly want to do with my life.”

If the difficulty is that you are afraid, take a deep breath, hold it for a count of four, and then exhale as much as you can. Follow that with the positive affirmation, “I have the necessary courage to overcome my fears.”

Whatever limiting affirmation you are repeating, turn it around. Develop affirmations which open you to limitless possibilities.

Jumped Starting the Subconscious

Every time you use a positive statement rather than a limiting one, you are opening your subconscious mind to a different possibility in life. When you use limiting words, your subconscious mind wants to support those words. When you use words opening you to possibility, your subconscious mind wants to support you in that area.

Not only the words need to be open to possibility, but also your attitude. You could ask, “Why” with an attitude of anger which closes off getting the answer. When you attitude is one of wanting to know the answer, your subconscious mind says, “Oh, you really want to know? Let’s look for the answer.”

Developing affirmations take some skill. Once you learn how to do it, you’re on your way. Just remember to put your whole self into them as I talked about in the last post.

Anchoring in Happiness to Overcome Fear

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The Power of Anchoring in Happiness to Overcome Fear

After having completed a week of studying the chapter called “Self-Confidence” in Napoleon Hill’s 1925 edition of The Law of Success, I wanted to present a powerful tool for overcoming fear that was popularized in the latter part of the 20th Century. This tool is one anyone who can touch their body in any way can use. If you make diligent use of this simple little technique you will be able to overcome your fear of success or of failure. The result being that you will be able to achieve your goals.

First Step Is Complex Visualization

I’m sure you have heard of the importance of visualizing your goal to fix them firmly in your mind. Because the of the word “visualization,” people think they only need to form an image. Most don’t realize that fixing your goal firmly in mind also requires the incorporation of all your senses. For instance, if your goal is to have a loving relationship, form a scene in your mind of what that loving relationship would not only look like, but also the sounds, tastes, smells and touches involved. The most powerful addition to your image is your own personal feelings. Be sure and feel the emotions of love, acceptance, joy, desire in this relationship you want.

If your visualization is about money, form an image of all the sights, sounds, smells, tastes, emotions and physical sensations of what having money is to you. If being wealthy involves good food and drink, smell the aromas, taste the savory or sweetness of what you put in your mouth, hear the background sounds of wherever you want to be enjoying this meal, feel the texture of the money in your hand, see your bank statement, experience the feelings of security that come with your money.

Second Step is Color

As you can tell, forming your visualization can take some time and, if done with full activation of all your senses, can be rather complex. You gather your total experience and link it to a color. What color represents for you the scene you so completely formed? If you are color blind and can only see shades of grey, choose a part of your image, say a wine glass, tree or twenty dollar bill that can bring to mind the entire scene. See this color or image overlay the deep sensory image you have developed.

Third Step is Anchoring in the Scene

You want a very quick action that anchors in your complex visualization. Your body is an information transmitter. Put information in your body and it will hold it there for you. This is a type of cellular memory. Make use of this power of your body by anchoring in your complex and complete sensory scene you developed. Touch your body while the scene in your mind is at its height with the color or single image you have selected to represent the whole. Bringing your thumb and forefinger together of one hand is what most people use. If you experience paralysis that prevents you from moving your fingers, press your lips together firmly, move your tongue in a particular way or even squeeze your eyes shut. Once you combine the physical anchor with the color or symbolic representation and anchor this into your body with some sort of physical touch, you have what you need to eliminate fear.

Forth Step Is Using the Positive to Extinguish the Fear

Now you are set for a very simple process that, when used regularly, will assist you in get rid of your fear. Note I wrote “simple.” I did not say this is easy. The simple process takes dedication and commitment.

Be sure you are not touching you body using your physical anchor. Now bring to mind your fear. Experience your feelings of fear. Now use your physical anchor, such as bringing your thumb and forefinger together. See the color or symbol you developed to represent your complex scene. Get in touch with all the sensory information of the scene that is positive for you. When the fear is gone, or at a very low level, release your physical anchor and repeat the process.

You can do this if you will make the time and effort to do so.

Self-Confidence Is a Skill You Can Develop

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Self-Confidence Is a Skill You Can Develop

People have the mistaken notion that someone either has or doesn’t have self-confidence. They believe you were either born with it or you had parents who instilled it within you by their encouragement and affirmation. Few people realize that self-confidence is also a skill you can develop if you have the determination to work at it. You can develop self-confidence if you will only begin a few simple strategies.

Begin with What You Can Do

I am reminded of my high school chemistry teacher. It was time for mid-term exams and, being the scared 17-year old students we were, we were terrified of failing our exams. After all, we knew that chemistry was difficult. We also knew that our teacher demanded excellence from us. What we didn’t realize was how much he wanted us to succeed and how much he wanted us to know we could succeed. No, he didn’t give us an easy exam anyone could pass. What he did was start us off with a question that any of use should know. I still remember it. “How many centimeters to an inch?” (The answer, by the way, is 2.54.) You could feel the self-confidence rising in the room as each person read and answered that question.

We asked him later why he started the test with such a simple question. He told us how he’d learned that starting off an exam with a question everyone should know broke through the fear that could prevent the student from accessing the knowledge locked up in their head. When we realized we could answer these first questions we would relax. The fear would dissolve, self-confidence would rise and he would learn what we really knew rather than discover what our fear would prevent us from recalling.

If you don’t think you have self-confidence, you need to realize that self-confidence is a matter of the mind. It has little to do with what your actual skills are. Every person knows at least someone who believes s/he is great at something but is actually mediocre. You can’t convince that person of their actual lack of ability because they believe with all their being they are good at what they do.

Practice What You Can Do and Add Affirmations and Emotion to Your Actions

Let’s say you play the guitar and would like to have the self-confidence to play it publicly, but your fears of people deriding you keep you from taking the risk. While you’re practicing your guitar, notice how your fingers easily make the chords. Each time you make an easy transition congratulate yourself. If you say to yourself, “Anyone could do that,” know that you are not telling the truth. If you walked down the street and asked the first hundred people if they knew how to play the guitar, how many would say “Yes”? You can do something only a small percentage of the people in the world can do. Affirm yourself every time you succeed while you are practicing.

Your next step is to play in front of a few people, family or friends. You might already to this. They might even tell you that you are good. What do you do with what they say? If you don’t have self-confidence, you most likely don’t believe them. Take a risk and believe them. Make their positive comments an affirmation for you that you repeat to yourself. Get in touch with your feelings of joy and delight as you play. Get in touch with what an emotional rush it would be to hear people hooting and hollering their delight when you play.

You may not play the guitar. Pick something you do well. It doesn’t matter what it is. Perhaps you’re one of the top scorers in a particular video game. Break down the skills and dexterity it takes to play video games. Tell yourself how good you are at each skill. Notice how that particular skill can be used in other areas of your life as well.

You will become self-confident when you notice and affirm what it is you do well. You simply need to want self-confidence more than you want to stay mired in self-doubt.