What You See May Not Be Reality
You may know
people who seem to be brimming with self-confidence. Recognize that you can observe
what they’re doing, not what they’re feeling. It’s possible their insides don’t
match their outsides. You can learn to trust in yourself even when you aren’t filled
Back when I
was in the convent, I was in charge of a particular function. The next day
someone complimented me on how much confidence I exhibited. She wished she was
I could have
laughed out loud. Today, I would have. Back then, I wasn’t going to let anyone
know how terrified I had been.
confidence in yourself is about trusting yourself, trusting that you’ll be able
to handle the job, whatever job that is.
You may have a difficult time
trusting yourself and wonder if you’ll ever be able to. Don’t think you’re alone
in your self-doubts. Not trusting yourself seems to be ingrained in the human
condition. It’s something many experience and find difficult to overcome.
Learn to Trust
The first thing to recognize is
that comparing how you’re feeling with how someone looks like they’re feeling
is a false comparison. Someone may look confident when they are, in reality,
Did you know that Barbra Streisand,
Adele, and Rihanna all suffer from stage fright? Adele was so scared she once
projectile vomited onto a member of the audience.
Even if you have fear, have faith
in your accomplishments. Own them. If you’re a great singer, trust in your
ability. Practice and prepare. Then trust your skills.
Trust your instincts, your gut. No,
you won’t always be right, but, if you keep track, you’ll find that you’re
right more often than not. Every time you trust yourself and you’re right, you’ll
become more self-confident. As you gain in confidence, you’ll have more of
those intuitive hits making life easier.
The Role of Others in Self-Trust
You have three types of people:
those who don’t care one way or the other about you, those who’ll cheer you on,
and then those who’ll be negative.
Don’t try to please those who don’t
care. Accept them.
Find people who will be your cheering
squad. I’m not talking about people who will cheer you blindly along your way
when you need a little direction. Find those who cheer and will also let you
know when you’re heading the wrong way. These folks will build your trust in
There will also be the nay-sayers.
Unfortunately, your tendency may be to pay more attention to them than is
necessary. Work at filtering out negative information. Focus on the positive in
your life. Listen to those you trust. Avoid negative people. They take delight
in bringing down people just because they can.
Have Faith in Yourself
Trusting yourself may require a
leap of faith. Take some thoughtful chances. Keep track of your
accomplishments. Learn from mistakes and focus on where you’re going.
You are your greatest asset, and a
wonderful asset you are.